10 February 2017

First posted on Facebook on 10 February 2017.

1 February 2017
Her name was Chris, she was halfway through a 12 hour shift. She asked for medical notes, and said that she tells all her pregnant ladies to carry them everywhere from the start; saying that you might just slip and fall in Markies! She took blood pressure, pulse, and the obligatory urine sample. She laughed when she heard the response that the husband should know better than to speed from Dundee to Perth.
Her name was Kirsty, she wore a black dress and a reassuring smile. She asked a few questions, explained that a little brown blood is often nothing to worry about, and advised that a precautionary ultrasound would give a closer look at babba. "There's the head!" Then she went quiet.
She moved transverse with the wand, then back.
She turned the sound on, and quickly off.
The image on the screen showed a pulsing movement in the bottom corner, but nothing in the centre.
"I'm going to have to get someone else in to look at this ultrasound, before..." she trailed off.
"Before?"
She paused. "I'm so sorry, I can't quite see a heartbeat, I have to get someone else in to have a look." She waited a while, observing the world imploding.
Her name was Morna, she observed that the machine was the same as her own. She made the same observation as Kirsty, and offered condolences, while Kirsty reached out to offer a reassuring touch to the leg. The baby measured 13 weeks and 3 days, although it would rightly have been 14 and 4.

3 February 2017
His name was Adam, but of course he was referred to as Dr. Gordon by all who spoke of him. He explained what happens next, he acknowledged the support of the grandmother, and the father, although he noted that he would be suffering too. He asked if it would be ok to do another ultrasound. He said that often, he can observe things on an ultrasound that would provide some insight into the reasons behind it. Evidence that is lost "afterwards". The baby measured 12 weeks and 6 days, although he explained that 2 days had passed since the world imploded, and the baby may not be lying as straight as it once was.

6 February 2017
Her name was not shared, but it was printed on the faded label sewn into her tunic. She explained that Dr. Gordon had to go into surgery, and he was the only one who could sign for the medication. The first pill to prepare the womb for what was to come. When the pill was given, about an hour later, she left the room and said to take as long as was needed.

8 February 2017
Her name was Emma, she was calm and clear in her manner. She asked what had been explained in Perth, then clarified that it would be 4 pills, while apologising that the doctors had not signed off on the painkillers. When she returned, the doctors had finished their rounds, so she came back with the full complement of drugs.
Her name was Kate, her hair was the same faded pink as the dressmaker, from last year's wedding. Through the course of the day she offered encouragement in every form, and was there to witness the signing of the post mortem authorisation.
Her name was Lorna, she held a hand, and held things in place during one of the more un-dignified parts of the day. At 4.02pm, she entered the room to say goodbye, as her shift was over, and remind that support was always available.
His name was Alex, he had a faint Canadian accent, and blue shoes. He completed all his medical training in the UK, and said he specialised in Obs & Gynae after a rewarding placement with supportive people.
Her name was Shona, her grey tunic did not have her name, but the name of the university. She was in her third year, and softly spoken, with a nice smile.
Her name was Dr. Roselyn Mudenha, her buzzer went off as she was going through the consent forms for Post Mortem. She took her time to explain what the options were, and explained how any samples kept for training and research could help.
Her name was Margaret, she was just finishing her shift in ward 36, but said she would be back in the morning.
Her name was Cheryl, she had a perfect little Sassoon bob that somehow showed off her smile. She was there for the night shift, and said that they never warn patients that they would be woken up at 2am for obs, she was there to answer the bell in the middle of the night to the toilet, and offer that reassuring smile to send me off to bed again.

10 February 2017
My name is Emma, and these are the names of some of the people who supported my husband and I through our worst time. They work for the NHS, and they deserve acknowledgement for the work that they do, and support, for the work that they do. #LoveTheNHS